The Circus Infinitus - Victoria 7 Read online

  I couldn’t take any more. With a yelp of terror I dropped to all fours and bolted. My claws scrabbled against the floorboards as I skidded from the room and out into the hall. All I wanted to do was escape from this house, with its musty smell and walls that seemed to be closing in on me from all sides. I blundered my way out through the scullery and darted out across the dark, overgrown grounds. The cool night air brought with it many smells of night; the freshness of damp earth, grass, the spoor of small animals that had crossed the garden.

  I slowed my frantic flight as the smells started to nudge my terror away. I could detect so many different beasts; foxes, pheasants, quails, rodents, rabbits… I began to follow the trails they had left, sniffing my way into the undergrowth in pursuit of my prey. I could get used to this, I thought.

  Suddenly, a hare burst out of the bushes right in front of me and shot off like a cannonball.

  I took off after it, my heart racing with delight at the chase. But I was so much bigger and faster that I quickly caught up with it. I leapt into the air to pounce, but it managed to dodge at the last second, and veer off to one side. I hadn’t anticipated that! I struggled to coordinate all four of my paws and turn, losing valuable time. This form may have come with enhanced instincts and senses, but I still needed to practice my hunting skills.

  The hare was almost gone. I took off after it, but it was so nimble, leaping and dodging through the closely packed trees. In contrast I crashed through the undergrowth like a charging elephant.

  But I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had to much fun. My blood was up now, and I wanted that damn hare!

  I wasn’t going to stop until I caught it.

  The creature squeezed under some fallen logs which I had to leap over. On the other side it veered off again, but I knew its tricks now. I turned as well, gaining on it, smelling its desperate fear. My paws thundered against the ground. Soon I was close enough. I leapt, bringing both my front paws down on the fleeing animal.

  My weight was sufficient to snap its spine. But it still lived, and keened desperately for help. I bent my head and closed my massive jaws around its throat, snapping its neck. Then I lifted my head to the sky and howled my triumph over my very first kill.

  Yes, it was only a hare, but I felt very proud of myself. It also had very little meat on it, but I still ate it any way, even crunching its bones between my teeth to get at the marrow inside. When I’d finished, there wasn’t much left other than shattered bones and scraps of fur. I kicked some dirt over it with my back paws and sauntered off in search of more night-time frolic.

  But all too soon the sun rose. It didn’t burn this body like it had my previous form, but it did drive all the nocturnal creatures back into their burrows. Feeling self conscious, I retreated back to the manor. But I couldn’t bring myself to go back inside. The stench of death and decay coming from within was just too intense. I amused myself by sniffing around the grounds, exploring all the new scents I encountered, and marking the territory as my own. Once or twice I noticed servants watching me warily as they went about their business. I noticed Penny daughter Liza hanging up sheets and paused behind a wall to watch her.

  She was about sixteen years old, and surly like most teenagers. Personally, I’d never had much time for her. She was an attractive birdbrain only interested in chasing whatever boys still remained on the estate. But now, for some reason, I was fascinated by her. Perhaps, because in this form I could experience the true beauty of her youthful scent, sort of sweet like roses, but with a delightful salty tang.

  I felt like I wanted to chase her. But I didn’t want to pounce on her and devour her. For some reason I wanted to pin her down and … lick her all over.

  It was a very odd feeling, and made me feel warm in a very odd place. I couldn’t understand it, and shrank even lower behind my hiding place before she could spot me.

  But Liza was too busy grumbling under her breath about how all these chores were grinding into what she preferred to be doing; romping in a hayloft with the gardeners’ boy!

  I know I shouldn’t have been able to hear those sub-vocal mutterings, but my hearing had also improved. I could detect practically every bird in the vicinity, and the shuffle of tiny creatures in the undergrowth; lizards, mice and the occasional rabbit, as they scuttled off into hiding.

  Then Liza stomped back into the house, taking her wonderful odour with her. I was left wondering what to do. I felt my pulse beating in a place it had never beat before. I picked myself up and trotted away from the manor. Perhaps I could find more to amuse myself with up in the forests in the hills.

  But as the sun rose and I followed various scent-trails, I began to feel tired and disinterested. Realising that I’d hardly slept the night before, save briefly before my change, I sought out a comfortable hollow beneath some bushes and curled up in the midday sun. I’d never have dreamed sleeping out in the open as a human, but as a wolf the grassy alcove was warm, dry and comfortable. I was asleep in an instant, and for some reason I dreamed of chasing rabbits that changed into young girls wearing long, filmy dresses.

  This seemed a very odd body. It certainly did not appear to be the form of wrath that Crimpley had described. I may have slaughtered that hare before, but that had been out of hunger, not anger. I wondered what this form would be capable of when roused. I suspected it would have a dreadful temper.

  When I woke it was late afternoon, and the sun was dipping towards the horizon. I crawled out of my hiding place and padded back to the manor. Outside the kitchens I found a large bowl of meat-scraps. I thought it had been put out for someone’s pet, but I couldn’t see any animals about. Perhaps my presence had scared them off. It was quite a large bowl of food, and although it contained a lot of gristly off-cuts, tripe, organs and other pieces I’d never have eaten as a human, to my sensitive wolf nose, it smelled really good. My stomach growled. I put my snout in the bowl and gobbled everything up. I even licked the bowl clean. Delicious! I could have wolfed down another plateful!

  As the sun set, I was once more inclined to prowl around, absorbing various the new and interesting scents that had been laid down during the day. I followed the path Liza had taken down to the tumbledown barn, where she had met her young lover after lunch and they had retired in the loft together. I gathered myself for a leap, and easily sprang up into the soft, dry straw. I inhaled the scent of their love, strong and sharp, and rolled over in the hay to make the most of it. Once again I experienced that strange, warm beat in my loins.

  By the time midnight approached, I was quite hot and bothered by it. I could feel my temper fraying, and realised that if something set me off, I’d snap completely. I could feel the wrath Crimpley had spoken of, lurking in the background like an ominous stormcloud. If this strange hunger could not be sated, I would eventually turn into a snarling frenzy. But who could I ask about it? In this form I couldn’t speak! Did I even want to talk about something so personal? And soon the curse would strike again to turn me into someone new, someone with an entirely different set of feelings and abilities. The werewolf would be forgotten, like the vampiress, who already seemed like a stranger to me. Even now I could feel the amulet around my neck warming up as the change approached. How did it know the time? Did it have its own internal clock? Or was it attuned to the local passing of midnight? So many questions, all of which had probably been answered in my mother’s lost diary!

  I flopped back down behind the wall where I had watched Liza hang up washing, and closed my eyes.

  Chapter Four

  There was a sudden, bright flare of searing energy, and I was abruptly awake and staring out into the night. Dear God, who –what – was I now? I felt enormous; all arms and legs, and a great round body that billowed out behind me. I gazed down at my thin, pale arms – all four of them. They were very long and spindly, with equally as bony hands capping with vicious, clawlike nails. Beneath me uncurled four pairs of hairy black spider legs.

  I had become that awful spid
er creature Crimpley had mentioned!

  I lifted my uppermost pair of hands to my face, finding a relatively normal visage with eyes, nose and mouth – although my teeth were long and sharp. Did I dare venture into the house to examine myself in a mirror? Could I even get this enormous body through the front doors?

  I rose up onto my legs and started to move. I thought it would be difficult to coordinate all four of my back limbs, but like my various previous forms, my brain seemed to know how they worked, and I scuttled across the lawn towards the manor. A few lights still burned within as some servants still went about their business, and up on the second storey Crimpley threw the shutters of my room wide and gazed out into the night, probably searching for me.

  Did I have a spider’s ability to climb walls? I stopped at the wall and pressed my hands against the bricks. To my surprise, tiny hairs sprouted from my palms, adhering me to the stone. I lifted a hand, hooking my claws into a gap between two bricks, and pulled. To my surprise the seemingly spindly limb easily took my weight. I spread my other three of hands out on the wall, and lifted myself up into a vertical position. I found purchase for my feet, and they stuck too. I clung to the wall as easily as … well, a spider.

  I allowed myself a smile as I began to climb towards the open window. Once, as a child, I had tried to climb up the ivy on the house’s south face. After the plants had torn away from the bricks, sending my plummeting to the earth, I had given up such tomboyish behaviour.

  But this was exhilarating! I couldn’t feel the pull of gravity at all, and reached the window without a single wave of vertigo. Fortunately the gap was large enough for me to pull my large spider backside in. Crimpley, who had turned away to leave, jumped backwards in horror. “Sweet Jesus!” he exploded. “The spider! One form your mother never let me see! She thought it was far too monstrous!”

  “I don’t think it’s monstrous,” I declared in a deep, liquid voice I thought sounded like the vampiress’s, only softer, and a bit raspier. “I rather like it. What sin am I now, do you think?”

  Crimpley looked flustered. “I … I don’t know. Greed? Gluttony? Vanity?” He shrugged. “You certainly are an impressive creature, but methinks you should stay out of sight. I doubt many servants have seen this particular shape.”

  “Do you think so?” I crossed the room to the mirror, my claws ticking against the floorboards. “They know about the Vampiress and the wolf.”

  “Vampiress? That’s an interesting name.”

  “Yes, it just came to me. She’s certainly not a Violet, that’s for sure.” I examined my face in the mirror. I was paler than normal, almost white. I recognized my features in the spider’s face, but they were exaggerated somewhat; my nose and chin more pointed, my eyes larger and more tilted at the corners. I wore a large headdress that appeared to be attached to me, and was hard and chitinous like the plates that protected my torso and abdomen. It resembled a small spider attached to my head.

  “Yes, well the vampire is almost human in appearance, and as for the wolf … well, so far it has left them alone. They know if they leave big bowls of meat out for it, it won’t attack them,” Crimpley explained. “But the spider is far too frightening for them to handle – the reason why your mother kept it hidden. She spent her days prowling the empty rooms, setting up webs.”

  I looked up at the ceiling of my bedroom, with its many cobwebs. I used to think they were the result of simple neglect. Now I knew better. From my position I could see dozens of insects trapped and dead in the fibres.

  My stomach, now positioned in the massive abdomen behind me, gave a growl. Normally I would have been repulsed by all those bugs, but now I pressed my hands against the wall and crawled up to the twelve-foot high ceiling. I started plucking the tiny creatures from the strands and popping them into my mouth. They crunched delightfully beneath my sharp teeth. I was dimly aware of how disgusted my human form would have been, but I thought they tasted delicious; salty, bloody and meaty with a delightful tang.

  “Oh ugh!” Crimpley pulled a face. “I shall leave until you finish eating!” He spun and hurried from the room.

  I pulled all the webs from the ceiling, plucking out each little delicacy. They were tasty, but very tiny. Soon I’d cleared the whole room, and I was still hungry. Perhaps in this form, I was gluttony. Twisting my body sideways, I managed to squeeze out of the door and scuttle out into the hall where Crimpley was waiting. When he realised I was still eating, he retreated into the library a few doors down.

  There were plenty of webs to clean up in the hall, and in one I even found the juicy, mummified corpse of a mouse. Gleefully, I ate it too. But my hunger compelled me to continue into the room my mother had died in, and divest it of bugs as well. I was so engrossed in what I was doing that I didn’t notice the sun rise, and servants start moving around. I hung from the ceiling and watched a couple pass right underneath me without looking up – fortunate for them.

  Later, my incessant feeding chased Crimpley out of the library as well. He retired to his own private chambers and locked the doors, making sure I stayed out. There, I found a veritable feast; the ceiling and shelves were thick with webs. My mother had been busy. Finally, I began to fill up. I realised that I’d have to replace the fibres, otherwise the next time I changed I’d have nothing to eat. What would I do then? Could I hunt in this form like the wolf?

  How did a spider make silk, anyway? Did I have to concentrate? Or did it simply happen? I reached around behind me with one hand, feeling for the base of my abdomen. I found my spinnerets. I crawled to one corner of the ceiling and thought about making silk. I felt a strange rumble deep in my body, and suddenly I sent a stream of wet silk half-way across the room!

  This was going to take some getting used to. Although some abilities were instinct, it seemed I would have to learn how to spin a web from scratch. My first few attempts were disastrous messes of silk, plastered thickly in the corners. I hoped they would at least serve their purpose enough to catch insects.

  But as I remembered the tangled webs I had found, I realised my mother hadn’t progressed much past messy patches to collect flies. If I wanted to create one of those beautiful masterpieces that dangled in the breeze, dew-bedecked and virtually invisible, I would have to practice long and hard.

  Well, in this form I couldn’t do much else.

  So, after catching a few hours’ sleep hanging upside down in the library, I began to cast my strings from one end of the room to the other. It did take a lot of time and effort to get them to land where I wanted them to. One night, when I had mastered my aim, I would go out into the forest and create enormous webs big enough to ensnare rabbits and other game.

  Crimpley returned later that evening, while I was practicing moving along the thick net of strands I had virtually covered the ceiling with. He gave a long, low whistle. “I’ve never seen anything like it! When the servants see this, they will certainly gossip!”

  “Tell them not to destroy it,” I requested as I swung down and landed on the floor with a thump.

  “They know not to clear away the webs. But this, I fear, is no ordinary web.”

  “I am no ordinary creature.”

  “Yes ma’am, but you would do well not to make your … strangeness so obvious. Far too many retainers and tenants have left over the years. Those that remain do so only because they have nowhere else to go – down and out, shunned by the families, on the run from the law, etcetera.”

  “And why do you stay, Crimpley?” I purred as I stalked over to him. I might have pushed him away as the Vampiress, but now, as the Spider, I found him rather interesting. I placed two hands on his shoulders and looked him in the eye. He cringed, and I could smell his fear. “Do I really pay that well?”

  “Yes, you do rather.” He started to sweat. I licked a bead from his cheek with a pointy tongue. He wanted to run, but wasn’t strong enough to break from my grip. “Please don’t bite my head off.”

  “Oh, I wouldn’t dream of doing that
, Crimpley. At least not until we’ve mated.” I gave a wicked chuckle at my dark joke.

  However he was not amused and looked visibly appalled by that! I sighed and let him go. This time he practically ran from the room, relieved to get out of my frightening presence. Perhaps, when I was the Vampiress again, I would have my wicked away with him.

  I knew I could never have been so bold in my human form. Sweet Violet would have been appalled by the wanton way I was acting. But I wasn’t Sweet Violet any more. I was … the spider. No, I was a Spider Queen. I would have to think of a suitably impressive name for this body. My mother may have been horrified by it, but I loved it.

  Then, all too soon it seemed, the library clock started to strike midnight. A dreadful weariness overcame me, and it was all I could do to scuttle down the wall without losing control and falling flat on my face. I collapsed on the wooden boards and closed my eyes, just as the cursed necklace around my neck grew warm once more.

  I tumbled backwards into darkness, the cold, icy darkness of death.

  Chapter Five

  But I did not die.

  How could I possibly be dead when I was so damn cold? I felt like the very depths of winter were eating me right down to the bone. Somehow I managed to peel open my eyes and push myself up on trembling arms. Why was I feeling like this? It wasn’t winter – it was early Autumn, the days still quite mild and balmy.

  Looking down, I noticed my arms were still spindly like the Spider Queen’s, my bony fingers festooned with formidable black claws. But instead of being sheathed in silky white skin, my limbs were wrapped in ragged grey bandages trailing shreds and loose threads.

  Who on Earth was I now?

  Slowly I picked myself up, still trembling from the cold. I lifted one of those bandaged hands to my chest, but I couldn’t feel my heart beating. All I could feel were my ribs beneath more rags, and a thin coating of flesh. I pulled the rags aside to look at my skin – and gaped at the dark, leathery consistency of my skin.